London

Mayfair, Belgravia, and the quiet house

Mayfair and Belgravia

In Mayfair a house is judged by its timing before its table. Arrive at the hour stated, use the door you were told to use, and let whoever opens it take your coat before you look past them. In Belgravia the same rules apply at a slower pace: the street is quiet, the houses are narrow, and a caller who rings twice has already said something about themselves.

Garden formal

An afternoon in a private garden square is formal and outdoors at once, and the dress has to hold both. Structure does the work: a jacket that can be worn open, low heels that will not sink into gravel, a hat that does not need a hand to keep it in place. Nothing that has to be managed is worn to a garden where the point is to be standing up.

Afternoon tea, as geometry

Afternoon tea is geometry rather than appetite. The cup is not lifted until it is filled; the saucer is never rested on a lap; a spoon is placed behind the cup, not across it. Sandwiches are taken with the fingers and the plate is not stacked. A house that eats everything on the stand has rather missed the intention, which is conversation with something to do with the hands.

Parliamentary manners

Public life here keeps a manner of its own: disagreement stated to the room rather than to the person, a question answered rather than deflected, a title used once and then dropped. A guest invited into that world is expected to be interested rather than impressive, and to leave before the last of the coffee.

Common practice, with regional variation. Never law.